Meditation Secrets Revealed

One possible definition of meditation is the systematic training of the mind to focus inward thereby bringing it under our conscious control. For many beginners, meditation can be frustrating and difficult causing undue stress as opposed to relaxation. The mind is active, constantly seeking to understand, examine, and discuss. This becomes all the more apparent when we try to sit still for some time. There is a common misconception that we do meditation in order to silence the mind, however this is actually a byproduct of meditation, not the goal. To use force on the mind to silence the mind using the mind is a contradiction and generally leads to frustration and discontent. A friendlier way of approaching meditation is to think of our time on the cushion as a practice of observing the mind. With less ambition and more determination we are cultivating curiosity and awareness rather than force.

If one wishes to learn to ski, we do not start by going straight to the most difficult obstacle course and trail, instead we focus on our technique. We practice basic maneuvers on the “bunny slopes” and then gradually make our way to the more difficult trails. Similar in meditation, one must develop the groundwork and maneuvers in order to progress and learn. Here are a few simple meditation techniques that provide training for the mind, allowing us to relax and enjoy meditation. Try one, or several of these techniques and once you find one that works, practice it consistently and frequently – results will come.

Single Object Meditation: Start with something simple and not overly graphic, like a candle or a pen. Begin to gently gaze at this object and think about the object, the structure, the shape, color, size, anything that is related to the object. As you do this, feel yourself becoming physically and emotionally entangled with the object. After a comfortable time gazing, close your eyes and see the object in your mind’s eye. Hold it there for as long as you can until it begins to get fuzzy or starts to fade. Once you have determined that it has faded, or is significantly altered so that you have to imagine or recall from memory the object, open your eyes and repeat the process again. I find that very visual people are able to do this easily and find this exercise to be fun and non-visual people have a very difficult time holding the object for even five seconds. If you are one of those people who have a very difficult time with this, keep practicing on a regular basis and you will improve dramatically. This is a preliminary exercise and can be beneficial to practice for a few weeks before trying the other three techniques.

Develop the Watcher: Take a small part of your attention and assign this part the task of watching everything that flutters through the mind – without judgment or criticism. Imagine this part as a video camera that records everything, to be stored and analyzed almost immediately after it occurs. As you begin to develop this ability, you can notice thoughts, stories, narratives, emotions, reactions, and many other processes going on in your mind. This form of meditation, sometimes referred to as mindfulness can be practiced anywhere and anytime. It is essential that we do not criticise or condemn what we see, imply observe and grow in awareness and depth. With clear awareness, comes insight, understanding, and the power to change.

Mantras: A powerful and easy technique to conquer internal dialogue is to repeat a words or phrases over and over again. By concentrating the mind on these specific words, all other thoughts are cast aside. There are many sacred mantras that exist in the world but the most important factor in choosing a mantra is that we cultivate an attitude of deep reverence for the words – as if they are sacred. In some traditions, mantras are whispered into students ears and the students is to keep this mantra secret and never speak it out loud.

With time and practice, the mind will begin to quiet down and only the breath and the mantra will be heard. Once this state is achieved, there is no more need to for the mantra because all intruding thoughts have been cast out. Over time, just a few conscious breaths and the thought of the mantra should be enough to clear the mind. Clearing the mind is of course not the end goal of meditation, rather, it is the state that enables you to begin meditation; this is where deep self-exploration begins.

Breath Awareness: Once a comfortable and steady upright posture is established, bring the attention to the belly. Notice how it rises and falls. In the beginning, one or both palms can be placed on the abdomen to bring awareness to the sensations there. Focus the mind on the breath as it moves in and out, and as soon as the mind becomes distracted, without judgment or distress bring it back to the belly and the breath. This is probably the simplest and one of the most commonly used meditation techniques in the world. Breath awareness and mantra repetition can be combined to further train and focus the mind. One example would be to say “In” on the in-breath and “Out” on the out-breath.

Habits are a reflection of our thoughts, manifested through repetition of actions. Right habits can be our greatest aid on the path to freedom from desires and fears, but bad habits can become obstacles. They can bind us, constricting our mobility, limiting our choices and our thinking. The challenge in being awake, aware, and present is to watch our own actions and analyze them. Ask yourself the question, “What in my life do I do by habit, and how are these habits serving me?”

Awareness is the essence of of our being, our birthright. But sometimes we forget, get distracted with life and the many responsibilities that take up our time. Here are a few ways that we can change bad habits by brining awareness onto the present moment.

1. Memory triggers

A memory object is a place, person, or thing which we designate as a trigger for the immediate assessment of our internal state. For example, lets say there is a painting hanging over your desk, whenever you look at that painting that is the trigger to stop and bring awareness to thoughts, emotions, and the surrounding environment. Awareness is objective, it is without blame or judgment – a simple observation of the facts. Paradoxically, we are building a habit to become aware of our own habits.

Doorways are a good memory objects because we go through hundreds of them every day. Upon walking through the doorway, immediately come into the present moment and bring awareness to the five senses to soak in the new surroundings. Remember to notice!

2. Breath

We must breath to live, it is something real, concrete and ever present within ourselves. Breath awareness is one ofthe fundamental steps to raising awareness, learning meditation, or any other internal study. Take a moment right now to focus on the breath. Notice the subtle qualities of depth, speed, location in the body, and even the texture. As often as possible throughout the day, remember to bring attention to the breath. Become curious to discover what is the quality of the breath when there is anger, sadness, joy, excitement, or calm?

Explore, have fun, be playful in figuring out what works best for your life and circumstances. Keep in mind that for these techniques to be effective one must be vigilant to remember to practice consistently, frequently, and for a long time util awareness becomes a natural state of being. Many negativities can be compared to shadows, they are a the darkness outside that stem from within. Awareness and mindfulness is the sunlight that has the power to drive away this darkness. Simply remember and let the sun shine.

As I look around me at a classroom of over 20 eager and curious 6th graders sitting on pillows in a carpeted room with colorful paintings, famous quotes, and a picture of social change leaders such as Martin Luther King Jr, I can’t help but think how far we have come.

At this West Oakland School, every youth is taught mindfulness meditation, yoga, and mindful listening. This under-funded inner city school is taking a radical step towards preventing further violence in it’s community by teaching  students to seek more peaceful and harmonious ways to live.  Growing Up Mindful, is a program designed to teach students mindfulness, open and honest communication, yoga, and other consciousness raising activities. Knowing that this class is now integrated into the school curriculum with the approval and encouragement of the staff and principal is a dream come true.

This program is no singularity, similar programs are sprouting in many elementary, middle, and high schools all over the country. Yoga and Mindfulness are also being taken into jails, juvenile halls, and hospitals. With so much research to back up the claims that Mindfulness meditation and yoga improve concentration, memory, attention, reduce stress, and improve overall health, its no wonder that these ancient practices are finally making their way to public schools.

In addition to the benefits already mentioned, in a school setting students experience a radical boost to their self esteem and improved self image and confidence. By practicing yoga students are able to gain confidence in their own abilities to overcome physically and mentally challenging poses with a peaceful mind. The curriculum also focuses on establish mutual respect, kindness, and understanding- crucial to students facing inner city violence and oppression in their own communities.

“Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they lead to actions.
Watch your actions, they create habits.
Watch your habits, they build your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”

~Upanishads

From my favorite yoga book, the Patanjali Yoga Sutras, comes a few gems of wisdom that help me retain my happiness and inner peace when deal with people. By putting these attitudes of mindfulness into practice I have saved myself a lot of emotional pain and built many wonderful relationships. In order to maintain our peace of mind we need to consider the four types of people in the world that we may encounter and the four ways to approach them.

When encountering a happy person, be kind and friendly to them. Often when people see someone who is happy, their initial reaction is to feel jealousy and dislike for that person. They may even blame that person or “that type” for their own problems. This attitude never does us much good. While that person may walk away, we are burning up inside with hatred and rage against that person. Instead, be friendly and think, “Wow, how nice it must be to be that happy, isn’t it wonderful. I want to be that happy also.” Frequently, people think of emotions as something that just comes up, as if they have no control over them. But like anything else in life, the more we practice something the better we become so always strive to practice positive emotions of joy, friendliness, and kindness.

The next type of person that we may meet is the unhappy. When we meet such a person, we can practice compassion for their situation and perhaps try and help them if this is within your means and appropriate for the situation. I am frequently astounded at how much I can do just by acknowledging somebody, offering them a smile or a helping hand. Somebody may be having a bad day or upset about something and they may be very focused on the story going on inside their head. Just a bit of compassion can snap them out of their mental misery and bring them into the present moment. Sometimes it takes just a little – to do a lot.

Then there are the virtuous, these are people that we can learn from and look up to. With these people we can show delight and admire them for their virtuous qualities. Don’t try to criticize them or pull them down, you will only cause yourself mental turmoil. Instead, find the qualities that you wish to possess that they have and use that person as your role model. They will be flattered and might even offer you some guidance or advice.

And lastly, there are the wicked people. Every once in a while we will meet such a person and the best thing to do is to stay away from them and disregard them completely. There is a story of a small sparrow that has built a warm and cozy nest in preparation for the rain and across from it is sitting a monkey. As the rain starts, the sparrow is dry and happy in it’s nest while the monkey is getting drenched. The sparrow decided to offer the drenched monkey some advice on how to build a nest but instead of gratitude, the monkey becomes enraged thinking that the sparrow is proud of it’s position and proceeds to tare the sparrow’s nest apart. The sparrow has to fly away and it too gets drenched in the pouring rain. When you recognize such a monkey, do not try to help it or offer it advice, it will always result in disaster. The best thing to do is to disregard them – they must learn on their own.

With these four keys of friendliness for the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and disregard for the wicked, we can approach any situation with a peaceful mind and maintain our calm.

I am frequently asked by people for advice regarding their personal and professional lives and I usually start with questions such as, “What happens in your mind? What do you see, hear, feel, and think?” It is shocking how few people are able to answer these relatively straightforward questions, yet the answers are the key to overcoming many people’s challenges. The good news is that it is fairly easy to develop this self awareness.

A simple, yet powerful, meditation technique is to create a silent watcher over your own mind. Its a simple practice that you can begin to develop into a daily habit. Take a small part of your attention and assign this part the task of watching everything that flutters through your mind. Imagine this part as a video camera that records everything, to be stored and analyzed almost immediately after it occurs. Stop reading for a few brief moments, and try this RIGHT NOW! As you begin to develop this ability, you can notice thoughts, stories, narratives, emotions, reactions, and many other processes going on in your mind. By watching and then analyzing yourself at all times, in all situations, you can discover what kinds of thoughts are going through your mind, which will quickly bring realizations and epiphanies about your own beliefs, motivations, actions, and reactions.

The only way a fish can understand water is by getting onto the shore, and looking back down into the water. You are the fish and the water represents your thoughts. In order to understand, analyze, and ultimately steer your mind, you first need to watch yourself from the outside, as a passive observer. At first, this may seem to be strange, or daunting as the self now how has to pay attention to the self, but it quickly becomes second nature. I want to make it very clear that the watcher or observer must not participate or be in any way involved in what is going on in the mind. This means that it should not make comments or judgments on what is seen, but simply observe passively and report, similar to a surveillance camera.

Be patient and do not become discouraged if you forget or become distracted, this is completely natural. Keep with it, and in time you will develop the ability to keep mental track of the chaotic landscape of the mind without becoming distracted from daily activities. If I could recommend any one meditation technique in the world, this would be it. It is crucial key to opening the door to self awareness, personal growth, stress management, mental clarity, and peace of mind.

My grandfather is one of the happiest men I know. He is 87 year old with failing hearing, loss of eyesight, no teeth, frequent migraine headaches, and yet, he is always there, greeting me with a grin and a smile. I wonder, what it is that makes him enjoy life so much while others at his age, and even much younger, are completely depressed, somber, bitter, and so on. I know that when I hear that slow rhythmic soldier shuffle of a walk, I can count on him being in a good mood, ready to hear about my life and eager to tell me about his own. Positive thinking perhaps? Maybe he is the type of person that always sees the glass half full.

I think it is more than that. He tells many stories and they frequently highlight just how lucky his life has been. When he thinks back on his life, he dwells on the challenges he overcame, on the creative solutions, on the relationships he has built and the amazing people he has met. As we sit in the backyard and gaze out over the lush suburban landscape, I hear him say, “Isn’t this wonderful, look at how beautiful this is.” In those moments, he emits a pure feeling of gratitude and appreciation for what he has. It is completely out of his control, he accepts it, and is grateful. He is always present in the moment, still sharp of mind, and quick of wit. I love, admire, and respect my grandfather, he has mastered the art of joy.

For those of you that earn for bullet points here are the take-away lessons from Grandpa:

1. Be present in the moment

2. Appreciate what you have, even if its outside of your control

3. When dwelling on the past, think about your accomplishments, not the failures.

USA Today Article: June 8, 2008

This article just barely touches on all the research that has been done in the last 30 years to prove that meditation and mindfulness can create huge psychological and even physiological changes. In fact prayer and meditation are very similar but the main difference is that one the former is intricately associated with a religion practice while the latter is a technique. Meditation is a skill, just like riding a bicycle or learning to drive a car. One does not have to be spiritual or religious in any way shape or form to practice meditation or mindfulness. In fact, the same can be said for prayer. People frequently get confused by this because these techniques come from religious traditions of Buddhism and Hinduism, but they can be separated out. I personally practice meditation daily and love yoga but do not have any interest in Buddhism or Hinduism. Is this wrong? Would any Buddhist hold this against me? I doubt it.

Despite a growing pile of Western and Eastern scientific research about these practices, there is still a lot of misconception and narrow minded thinking, especially among scientists. The Dali Lama recently spoke at a neuroscience conference about conducting more research on meditation to help people deal with stress and better control their moods and as a response to his invitation, over 500 scientist signed a petition to try and stop him from speaking there. Their reason; don’t want religion mixed in with science. What rubbish! Like helping people deal with stress and gain greater emotional control is such a terrible thing. If there is one thing that we can all learn from the great religions of the world it is to have more compassion, kindness, and love. I think that everyone could use a bit more of these qualities, no matter what religion or belief system they ascribe to.

One of the simplest ways to begin learning meditation is to watch your breath. This meditation technique is perfect for beginners because it is natural, easy, and can be done anywhere and anytime. Begin by paying attention to the breath as it leaves and enters your lungs.

Take notice of any bodily sensations, thoughts, or feelings. At first, start with five inhalations and five exhalations, counting slowly and taking deep regular breaths. Make sure that you are paying full attention and giving all of your focus to the breath. If you find yourself getting distracted, do not worry or get agitated, this is a natural part of the practice. When this happens, gently bring your attention back to the breath and begin again. Once you are able to maintain a steady focus and count five breaths without becoming distracted, you can increase the number of inhalations and exhalations.

Take note of the moments when you become distracted, there you will find the greatest lessons and realizations and I always try to think of those moments as reminders and helpful reminders instead of failures. To use the metaphor of driving a car, if you momentarily drift off the road, you simply take control of the steering wheel and bring the car back to the center of the road. It is exactly the same with this meditation technique. Watching and counting the breath can be done frequently and in short bursts, and you may find that even a five count will dramatically reduce stress and anxiety while calming, clearing, and centering the mind. As with any skill, the amount of time and length of practice will determine the benefit and mastery.